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A synonym strolls into a tavern.At the end of the day, a cliché walks into a bar -- fresh as a daisy, cute as a button, and sharp as a tack.A run-on sentence walks into a bar it starts flirting. With a cute little sentence fragment.Falling slowly, softly falling, the chiasmus collapses to the bar floor.A figure of speech literally walks into a bar and ends up getting figuratively hammered.An allusion walks into a bar, despite the fact that alcohol is its Achilles heel.The subjunctive would have walked into a bar, had it only known.A misplaced modifier walks into a bar owned a man with a glass eye named Ralph.The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.A dyslexic walks into a bra.A verb walks into a bar, sees a beautiful noun, and suggests they conjugate. The noun declines.An Oxford comma walks into a bar, where it spends the evening watching the television getting drunk and smoking cigars.A simile walks into a bar, as parched as a desert.A gerund and an infinitive. "And, gosh, since then I've just been waiting hours for you to get here." Someone is in a terribly silly mood tonight," Kimberly told Emily.Emily nodded gravely.They heard the shower stop. The three women looked at each other expectantly."I have never done anything like this before," Emily whispered."Me, neither," added Kimberly. "I'm a little nervous." So am I," Connie confessed, "and I've done this before... but not with Jerry." Hey, honey!" Jerry yelled down the stairs. "What should I wear?"Kimberly stifled a giggle. "What should he wear to an orgy?" she whispered."Uh, just jeans and that blue-and-green sport shirt," Connie called. "Or come as you are - "All three collapsed in barely smothered laughter.Jerry's muttered "Oh, shit..." was barely audible, but it was enough to prolong the laughter.Five minutes later, he came down the stairs. Connie's eyes widened. He was wearing her favorite jeans, the old, faded ones that clung to his legs and crotch. It was obvious that he was bare.
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But since she had met Jasper, he was all she longed for. The Pure aren’t supposed to allow themselves to feel desire in that way. They are only meant to desire to serve the Pristine Goddesses, the virginal saints of the Upper. But it could not be done- Jasper’s temptation was too much for Madison. He was from the Under, he was an Aberration! He had sinned! How could she feel this for him? Was she damning herself to an eternity of pain by doing this? Would she rot in the Under forever? Madison was goodness, Madison was kindness, Madison was compassion. Madison was Pure. But she knew she could not go back now, even if it meant making the ultimate sacrifice. Jasper had told her what to do, and had promised her everything would be okay. Could she trust him? Madison froze for a moment. But knew she must continue. She continued down the dark tunnel, the burning cold only a sensation that briefly passed through her almost-body. Since she was Pure, she needed no breath, no heartbeat, and no.

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